Because I feel like that way all the time. And I make up for it by making silly-ass faces.
Case in point: I volunteered to talk to 9th graders about how I got into web development and what my work days are like. I was scared as shitless. I mean, look at this crowd!
And it’s not only about public speaking. Every day is goddamn impostor syndrome day, and most of the time I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing.
And you know what? I think I’m ok with it. It took me so long to realize that all this anxiety is just a product of being in a field that constantly changes. There’s always stuff happening in the software world, and you’ll always find yourself learning something new all the time.
“Learning something new sounds awesome. Why wouldn’t you like that?”
Because it’s hard. It’s hard to know that you don’t know as much as you think you do and that lingering feeling of starting all over again. You feel like you’ll never “make it”.
I just want to say that this is normal. Being anxious is normal. Losing confidence is normal.
Just keep moving forward.